Rahab's Kitchen

Saddened By The Silence

2009-10-09T20:01:00.000-07:00

This is mainly for Tyler Dawn, but also for anyone else that comes here. This was to be a place that we could come together to find support from our communtiy that we had formed. I do not meed much support at the moment, but am more than willing to give it. But I have been saddened by the silence. What had started out so vibrantly, has started to shrivel and die. I thought that by putting anything on here to get any discussion going again might be good. Revive it a little. But like any relationship that has value, it needs to be worked for. So I will commit to coming here regularly to give support to any asking, and would ask that we could get the same commitment from others that are willing. We ALL need support from time to time, and this community has helped me through some very tough ones. The loss of my father, Jobs, high stress situations, and for that I am forever thankful. My hope is that we can keep this place of sanctuary going for all of those that may need it.

Apologies

2009-10-03T02:01:00.000-07:00

Didn't mean to offend you ... I have removed the posts

My apologies

Hope you and yours get well soon

taking my leave

2009-09-29T14:17:00.000-07:00

hey guys, I realise no one comes here much anymore, and i see that it has pretty much become a bully pulpit and a sounding board where things that would normally be put on personal blogs are showing up.

This started out as a support group and then it died off, but i came here today seeing health reform being pushed/clarified/whatever, and seeing just stuff that has not much to do with coming together and supporting each other so I am taking my name off the roll. I just don't feel comfortable having the rahab's Kitchen logo on my blog saying this is a safe place for a hug and a cookie to have someone come and find political stuff.

I love you all, i just can't deal with all of this anymore. This was a place to love each other, and i thought this stuff was for our personal blogs. I for one have a full plate of grief right now and came here wanting to share, but this feels partisan and feels negative. I have enough of that right now with a houseful of swine flu and a bunch of other stuff i would not want to discuss here with the way it looks.

Providence

2009-08-09T20:10:00.000-07:00

I quit my job in Savannah, GA, because I hated it, and Savannah. But I had a real feeling of peace about it. It only took two weeks in this economy for me to get another job. One that I did not apply for. One where I did not know anyone. But they still called me. That is called providence, and for that I am thankful.

immediate intercession, please

2009-07-24T07:45:00.000-07:00

hey, gang. not sure if anyone gets back here at all anymore, but i am sending out the word that your prayers are needed. my sister-in-law has miscarried several times and is pregnant again. she recently found out that although the baby still has a heart beat, her uterus is filling with blood and it doesn't look good. nothing short of a miracle will save her, so ask for one. thanks.

The best birthday present EVER!

2009-07-15T16:15:00.000-07:00

Tomorrow morning I will be coming out of an extended time of prayer and fasting, where I had chosen a few things that were near and dear to my heart to really concentrate on. Well, today is my 40th birthday and I got a call in response to one of my most heartfelt prayers -- my sons are getting the sibling they have been praying for over the last year.

Our beautiful birthmother Stephanie is 4 weeks (2 weeks) pregnant after battling secondary infertility (the inability to conceive a second pregnancy)! And she is due on the boys' birthday! I am just praising God that she and her husband Ryan are being so abundantly blessed!

Andy came to me about a year ago and told me, out of the blue, that he was praying for a baby sister -- and I told him he had to talk to his Mamma Stephanie about it.

I am on cloud 9 tonight!

Happy Birthday Tyler Dawn

2009-07-15T10:20:00.000-07:00

Happy Birthday Sweetie. I hope it's a great one!!

Hello Out There?

2009-05-06T13:05:00.000-07:00

So, what has happened to our little community? It seems to have fizzled out. I'm just curious...are we all too busy? Has facebook taken over our computer time? Are we all heading in different directions now on this journey? I believe it is all of the above for me. The weather is warm enough to play outside, and my kids demand much of my attention. The little time I seem to have squeezed out for myself has all but disappeared these days. I hope you are all doing well.

Good news and bad news

2009-03-31T09:05:00.000-07:00

The bad news is that Buddug, my favourite ferret, died last night.

The good news, for those who've been praying for me, is that I've found out that my job is safe, as someone else has taken voluntary redundancy.

Needless to say, I have rather mixed emotions at the moment.

prayer please

2009-03-09T08:24:00.000-07:00

well, we had a HUGE historical tree (100+ yrs old) in our back yard fall down yesterday... It is massive (I will post pictures on my blog soon!) It was intensely windy and I can't believe it fell down... It is SO shocking how it was uprooted... Anyway, it damaged some of our neighbor's property but not much really! No one was hurt, thankfully, and our house was miraculously intact. (The wind was so strong I remember saying a prayer off the top of my head, "God, keep us safe..." and he did!)
Please pray the insurance will cover the removal costs, etc. It is bound to cost A LOT and we honestly can't afford it...
Thanks

2009-03-02T05:04:00.000-08:00

This seems like such a flippant request in comparison to what everyone is going through. This question is for my Australian friends: I've just recently come out of country hibernation and moved to Canberra, and was wondering whether any of you were aware of any possible communities that would be worth looking into? I am strangely hanging out for some person-to-person again.

Thanks so much guys. Will keep all of you in my prayers.

Happy Birthday Ruth!!!!

2009-02-24T18:50:00.001-08:00

Saturday/ Sunday briefs (updates?)

2009-02-21T10:22:00.000-08:00

Hey everyone (... it's already Sunday in Australia)
I haven't been around an awful lot, but going through many blogs, I've noticed I'm not the only one...we've all got stuff on our plate... or is it that facebook is hijacking all the bloggers... damn them (JK)
so how is everyone...?

Redundancy looms

2009-02-13T09:37:00.000-08:00

(Cross-posted from my blog)

I work in a primary school in South Wales which teaches children aged 4-11.

Yesterday we were told that, due to falling pupil numbers, it will be necessary to make two teachers redundant this year. It could be any of the ten of us who aren't part of the school's senior management team who get the chop.

The atmosphere of the school has now totally changed. People have been close to tears, everyone is worried about their futures and staff morale and motivation have gone out of the window. None of us want to be made redundant, but equally none of us want to see two of our colleagues - people we like and respect - get the axe either. We're all in a lose-lose situation here.

Prayer would be appreciated. The final decision on who is to be made redundant, assuming nobody volunteers, will be made on March 11th.

And so it goes

2009-02-05T06:37:00.000-08:00

(cross posted from my blog)

Two days ago saw the hospitalization of my otherwise healthy (and young) mother. I'm not going to share details at this point, suffice to say they found a previously undiagnosed and unexpected, chronic problem. I will say it is a very good thing she got to the hospital when she did, because it could have resulted in something much worse than the miserable symptoms she's been having and the treatment she will now face. I'm thankful she's alive and has a great prognosis for recovery, with time.

However, of course, this has been difficult for me, a great sense of frustration that this was not diagnosed earlier, considering how much time she has spent at the Dr. these last few months. I'm frustrated that she had to become so ill before something was done. I'm frustrated that the amount of stress she's been under these last few years is a significant contributing factor, and like any good firstborn I keep wondering if there was something I should have done to help prevent it, or at least I should have realized something was wrong much sooner.

Of course, her symptoms have been somewhat mysterious these last few weeks, seeming very much like one thing, but then turning out not to be that at all. Dad and I both said now that we KNOW what's going on, it makes perfect sense and we both are kicking ourselves for not realizing it much sooner, even a year or two ago. I think maybe we didn't want to face the possibility.

In any case, I'm carrying a new weight around right now, and may not be as present as usual until things return more to normal. I appreciate your prayers for her recovery. Please pray for dad as well. Thanks all!

Greetings friends!

2009-02-03T11:23:00.000-08:00

I really don't have much to say -- I was just missing everyone. So.. HI!
I hope everyone is healthy, emotionally and physically. That's all for now. :-)

Update...

2009-01-28T16:53:00.000-08:00

Well, I still don't know what is going to happen. I am trying to work up the courage to apply for a debt consolidation/reduction loan. Crunching the numbers. I don't see how they will give me one. But...

This has shaken my confidence. A lot of issues trying to fight for dominance....

For those of you that have sent me help, you know who you are... THANK YOU!!!

Kenya

2009-01-27T03:32:00.000-08:00

Hey guys this is not a request for personal prayer but for an entire country. Alomost 6 years ago my hubby went to Kenya on a missions trip. Here he met a pastor called Aamos. Aamos lives in Nirobi slums with his family and does his best to in rich those around him whilst struggling to survive himself. He just popped up on my facebook chat thing and I did the socially acceptable thing and asked him how he was. He proceeded to tell me that Kenya is in the grip on a huge famon and 1000s die everyday and that he and his family are on the brink themselves. What do you say in response to that other than I ll pray. I feel usless and like a rich fat cat! Please can you pray for this country and this man

thx

songs you're still sick of

2009-01-25T01:23:00.000-08:00

maybe you haven't heard it in 5, 10 or even 20 years, but after the first few notes you know without a doubt... it hasn't been long enough. i thought this would be fun, and after the past few months, i think we all could use a little fun. :-)

i'll get us started.

Help?

2009-01-22T19:38:00.001-08:00

Hmm... this hard. The tape running in my head says, "You made this mess, you clean it up. And don't expect any help."

I'm not doing so well. A mistake from my past that wasn't handled well - financial - is biting me in the ass right now. And it seems to have pretty big teeth. If things go the way I was told on the phone this morning, the government could be taking 30% of my income starting next month. Which would make it so that I couldn't pay my bills.... Could you all think of me when you're praying? Thanks.

My husband just got fired

2009-01-22T11:23:00.000-08:00

I really didn't see this coming. But he got fired this afternoon. Please pray for us i don't know what we are going to do.

Update: Sunday morning

Okay so yesterday we get a phone call from somebody who works there. Mark's firing WAS THE BEST THING THAT COULD HAVE HAPPENED to that place. Finally, years of putting up with good people being terminated for no reason has gotten to be too much and people are angry and there are the beginnings of a riot going on. His boss had a meeting with the mechanics and their words were, "What did we do that was so awful that you fired our boss?" Well, I don't know about you, but there aren't many people I know who would say that. I haven't ever had a boss I was willing to say that about/ in defense of. The other supervisors now know that they aren't safe because they looked up to him in a big way for doing the right thing and never giving in to the bullying. The people on the floor are furious because Mark always supports them in their jobs (he even helps the linemen with placing product back on the lines as he is evaluating the lines).

On friday morning Abba said to me, "This is not over." He said it over and over again and I did not understand.

It doesn't mean Mark's boss gets fired and Mark gets rehired but Abba is right, this is NOT over. The person who called was devastated about it on thursday but now feels that it is the single best thing God could have allowed to happen.

Yesterday God reminded Mark that He always gets the bills paid and that things were going according to plan and suddenly I am super excited to see how this turns out.

Love to you all!

this is zaavan.

2009-01-21T07:32:00.001-08:00

as promised, here is zaavan, my son. he's 6 years old and has severe CP and MR. in laymen's terms, that's Cerebral Palsy and Mental Retardation. his other diagnoses are quadraparesis and microcephaly.

effectively, he cannot eat, drink, change, move, toilet... anything on his own. he requires hours of care. but that's not any different from any other kid. the attention and cares needed are just different. but, as you can imagine, it is well worth it. he is one of the best people i've ever met. i am constantly amazed that a boy with so many challenges can be the most joyful person i've ever known. he is one blissed out kid. in fact several are the nights when he wakes up laughing. and laughing and laughing and laughing. at nothing. at least, nothing that we can tell. but i have often suspected that he is able to sense things we can't.

being his dad has been nothing short of life changing. i am no longer the person i was when he was born. i have learned so much about how to communicate with people through learning how to communicate with someone who is not able to communicate through conventional means. (i.e. words) i blogged about that once before already.

every parent is different, but i know that coming to terms with zaavan was actually a quick process for me. we first got the news hours after his birth in the middle of the night. a massive seizure sent him into respitory arrest and he had to be intebated and moved into the NICU. it was thus the roller coaster began and i knew that something had to die. and what had to die were my expectations that i had for zaavan and who i hoped and dreamed he might be. he was as he is and there was no going back. nothing could change it. so i could either continue to grieve for something that never existed or i could simply accept zaavan as he is, no strings attached. i chose the latter and am glad i did. i have, of course, been overwhelmed several times at the challenges he faces, and the times when i have had to prepare myself for the possibility of his death when it has gotten bad. each time, however, he has pulled through. over and over again, grace seems to be the theme in this kid's life and i am glad to be privy.

and i am especially grateful for the near-deafening roar that went up into the spiritual ether on his behalf when i shared our challenges on december 1st. it certainly is a neverending stream of challenges. but it is also a never ending stream of overcoming those challenges, or learning how to be grateful for what we have been given. which is pretty cool.

this is zaavan. he is my perfect son, and i love him.

What's Been Happening

2009-01-17T23:38:00.000-08:00

Hello Everyone.

I know that my appearances lately have been sparse; not only here but on line and in my own blog as well. Most of you who follow my blog have seen a "turn" in the direction of my writing and me questioning pretty much everything that I have come to know as true in the past year or so. So now, I can come out and tell you what has been happening.

This past week has seen two very "huge" changes in my life. The first is that I started a new job with a new department this week. Big change for me but the timing is perfect when taken into consideration of where I want to go with my career. Secondly, on last Tuesday, I was divorced from my wife. This has been a decision that I have been agonizing for the better part of a year and I finally came to the conclusion that enough was enough. The hardest part, as you might imagine, was my beautiful son and the thought of not being around him all of the time but in the end, it just wasn't enough. Our split was amicable and so were the arrangements that we agreed on with respect to custody and visitation and I am so thankful for that.

You all have been a great source of support for me and I am thankful that I have this family to share with when things are good and to lean on when things are bad. There are a few loose ends yet to tie up so if you feel so led, ask a prayer that what I have to do next (regarding our home) goes smoothly.

My brain

2009-01-15T15:26:00.001-08:00

Guys, I have been quiet lately because of health problems, I had a TIA yesterday morning and they have me on hormones that are literally driving me crazy :(

Update: Valorosa asked why I am on hormones so here goes --

I am estrogen dominant because my ovaries only make a few hours of progesterone a month, instead of weeks. This is why I miscarry, well, one of the reasons. Unopposed estrogen is very dangerous and is a chief cause of strokes in young women. When i was 27, in response to some other issues, I was placed on birth control pills and had a severe TIA within a few days -- one that left me greatly impaired for 6 months and which still has left me with some memory loss and well mucked up my handwriting. They took me off of the pills but because of a misdiagnosis the same thing happened two years later. Please think of what happened to me the next time someone tells you that prescribing BC pills to teens without prescreening or parental consent is a good thing -- it happens more than they admit.

Now, I am not on BC pills right now but I am in peri-menopause and i think I am getting estrogen bursts that might have caused this. So I am on a progesterone cream to oppose the estrogen.

Thanks for all the prayers. I love you guys. I am like the wicked witch of the west over here. My poor kids.

Sustaining Concern

2009-01-13T09:55:00.000-08:00

Thanks to all of you who have dropped by my blog and left messages for me. I am sorry I have not written here, but I do read when I can to keep up with what's going on with you. Things have been difficult for me due to my son's drug addictions - two hospitalizations in the last three weeks, outpatient rehab, counseling, school expulsion and trying to keep up with my job.

Sometimes its the words of others that keep me going. I am a word person so every comment left feels like a warm hug, a shot in the arm of Vit B-12, an empathetic smile or a pep talk. Thank you.

Also, I don't know how to post here as "Prodigal Daughter" and am starting to freak out about my blogs being so interconnected and may have to do something "drastic" but am not sure what. I want my anonymity back!