Rahab's Kitchen

Changes

2011-08-20T18:21:00.000-07:00

As if my children have not endured enough changes this past year, I've decided to change my name back. You'd think that wouldn't be a big deal, but I've had quite the task to give them all assurance that regardless of my last name, I will still be their mom. Biology lessons on where babies come from only half appease them. Examples of other divorced moms with maiden names retaken barely phase them. Shakespeare with his "a rose by any other name..." has not impressed them. But I've worked and talked and explained my way into halfhearted permission. Finally!

What's interesting to me is the lengths at which one is required to go to just to have legal permission to reclaim a name. If I had the issue addressed in the divorce decree, it would have been said and done. I wasn't informed very well on that matter and opted to not have it addressed at the time. As my birthday approached (and is quite near) I got the idealistic notion that my gift to myself would be that I would retake my birth name. To accomplish this, I've had to refile a petition with the court; which irritatingly enough was as expensive as filing for divorce, as well as run a four week long advertisement in a local paper that I am filing this petition. For what purpose? For someone to protest? For my ex husband to complain? WT...? I digress....

This past Friday was the end of that four week period. Next I am to show proof of the advertisement's running to the court and wait to be assigned a date before the judge. So that he can finally drop his gavel and grant me permission to become... me. It should seem of no consequence, I suppose; just a legal step but somehow in a metaphysical sense I feel that another layer is peeling back in a very real way in this long journey of reclaiming myself.

I do not wish to live out my days signing my name as someone I am not. Knowing that soon I will hear a legal proclamation and permission to change gives me even more of a feeling of autonomy than the divorce decree itself.

As I continue to nurture, care-take and, yes, FUSS AT my children surely they will have no doubt -- yep, regardless, that's Mom.

spring cleaning

2011-06-24T08:57:00.000-07:00

Not really spring, but it still feels like it he thought to himself as he walked up the front steps.

The silence is broken by the sound of rusty hinges. A man enters the dust covered room and peers around. As he steps forward, the air is filled with a crunching sound that breaks into the stillness as well. He looks down and finds pieces of broken glass strewn about the floor and a brick in the center. He bends down to pick up and inspect the brick. On it are stenciled the letters OVOM. That's odd...

After surveying the rest of his dust covered surroundings, he notices a sink full of dishes. I suppose I should get on those...

So he runs some water. First for dishes, then for counters, followed by the mop bucket.

Finally, he runs some water to make coffee. As he sits down with a fresh mug, the smell of it, along with the smell of baking snickerdoodles, fills the air. And as he sat there he wondered whether this was just going to be a time of peaceful solitude, or if something else might find him...

Sigh

2010-10-12T14:16:00.000-07:00

I just need to vent. I'm angry and I need input. I can't post this on my blog because it's too public.

It's been almost 6 years since I left my ex-church. SIX years. You think people would get it by now.

Apparently not.

Some people from my ex-church seem to continue to be concerned for my faith. In the last month I have been invited to BSF by one friend and to a Graham Cooke conference (at my ex-church, no less) by another "friend". These two people are close friends with each other, and I sense a conspiracy. The one who invited me to Graham Cooke I haven't heard from in almost two years. (And if you don't know who Graham Cooke is, he's a prophetic and charismatic speaker.) The other friend is on my relay team, and I thought we were developing a really good friendship, until she invited me to bible study. I guess I'm not clear enough with people about the condition of my faith.

But I sense that there is some conspiracy to try to bring me back.

Why?

Why?

I don't want to be a bitch, but seriously...SHE POSTED IT ON MY WALL ON FACBOOK! How to be gracious and not insult her beliefs, while still getting the message across that I'M NOT INTERESTED.

Not even considering that I have no desire to enter the doors of my ex-church and attend the conference with my ex-friends...I'm not into the whole Graham Cooke thing anymore. Not at all. Years ago I would have jumped at the chance to hear him speak, back when I believed all that hyper-spiritual prophetic nonsense. I suppose this "friend" thinks I haven't changed in six years? And then the whole assumption that I "must have gotten over it by now"...WTF? I'm never going to "get over it". What went down there is forever a part of my being, and she was a big part of the problem.

So here I am angry and bitter all over again, because somehow my spiritual health seems to be other people's business. I don't get it. I mean I do get it, because evangelicals think everyone's spiritual health is their business, but do they not know when to leave well enough alone? I guess not.

It makes me soooo angry.

Thanks for listening.

Peeps?

2010-10-03T20:01:00.001-07:00

If I throw a brick through the window in this place...will anyone notice?

A Bum's Dream

2010-09-14T19:33:00.000-07:00

I have this dream. It's a bum's dream. I read online about a man in Utah in the States who lives in a cave with no money. Something in me soars at the idea.

Of course it's a utopian dream that the ground which we walk upon and which sustains us could be free, not fenced off into small commodities that people shore up into their bank accounts.

I know that will never happen. And anyway, the songlines were broken up. How else would a people live on this land when the songlines were broken up? But nevertheless, dreaming is still free.

Living in a cave would be a crazy, wild and whacky thing to do, as far removed from my present reality as the thought of not having to pay a thousand bucks' rent a month, of having to do jobs I despise, of being paid to do things I like. But everything changes, and strange things are realities. Indeed, one of my best friends lived in a cave in Spain for eight months, hardly spending a cent, doing yoga in the sunrise.

I wonder if you lived in a cave in Buchan, or the Grampians, how long it would take for the authorities weed you out and move you on. Back in the thirties in the Great Depression, itinerants set up camp in the land at the end of Dudley Street and along the Moonee Ponds Creek, over 60 humpies. They flew under the radar until World War II because this area was considered a wasteland of sorts, under nobody's jurisdiction.

What a grace the wastelands are.

The authorities do not like people to clutter up the landscape in this way today. It gets in the way of tourism. Cluttering up the landscape with your need is an ill-considered spectacle when there are housing estates that contain like-minded blocks with the same coloured roof tiles, their doors shut tight against each other.

I worked for several years in the CBD of Melbourne, transcribing court cases acted in by lawyers and presided over by strangely attired judges. There were so many statutes and rules and sections of Acts to follow, handed down over the years, composed into tomes, that the situation right before them needed to conform into. The most interesting conversations I had on the streets of Melbourne at that time were with a homeless woman with a penchant for philosophising who the cops harassed regularly for cluttering up the outsides of Flagstaff Station. We sat on the ground together and ruminated on the nature of stuff. She had irregular dreads, irregular teeth, an irregular psychology that kept her out there. God, I loved my conversations with her.

She discovered, slowly, she was an artist in her preceding years living in the city. She sold her art, beautiful, complex geometric patterns on black paper, drawn with gold or silver gel pen, drawn almost in a trance, soothing and smoothing out her soul somehow.

I have an overactive nervous system. I have gone from one acronym to another, from CFS - chronic fatigue syndrome - to HSP - highly sensitive person. It's just a label, something for me to discard on a deeper level, something helpful in other ways to understand this body I inhabit. On a frazzled day, a visit to the shopping centre can send me almost spare, needing a good meditation session and a yoga session to boot, to recover me from the fluorescent lights, the plastic shit, the wafting anxiety of the people walking past to buy plastic shit, intent in the lie that they are different from, separate to, the other that they are hating in front of them, getting in their way.

I feel like I take in so much some days that it thumps my heart, floods my adrenals. Too much. I see too much, it revs up the circuitry. Like a 5/4 rhythm composed upon a jangle of nerves.

That's how it is some days. I think that's why the cave looks so good sometimes. Less need for working as long, space to think, to ponder, to piece together, no rent. Just as long as I had access to a shower, so the library would let me in to use their internet connection :)

The supermarket washing powder aisle was one traversed with bated breath when I was living in the previous acronym, CFS. What they put in that shit I do not know, but the smell rammed itself in through my eyeballs and fuzzed up into my head. No one is so dirty that they need to get that clean.

the tale of Twitardia

2010-06-05T19:57:00.000-07:00

as far as i can tell it started with the books or movies or a combination of both.

i can't truly speak to everyone's experience and how they got TO Twitardia. but like i said it seems to have started for everyone with the books and movie. for some reason, for a population of women, Twilight completely smacked them upside the head and completely captured their imagination. captured isn't the right word. more like kidnapped. from what i understand from all of them they didn't see this coming. it came from out of nowhere and completely took their lives and irrevocably changed them forever.

i can't speak for all women, but i know that Erin devoured the books in a week. soon after, in talking with her friend who had originally given her the books, she found out that Stephanie Meyer (the author) had been working on a parallel novel to Twilight called Midnight Sun and was available online to read a portion. Stephaine Meyer however found out that her novel had been leaked online and vowed never to finish it.

that is of little consequence however as the damage had been done. from there many women found what is called "fanfic" which is short for Fan Fiction. fiction written by fans of the series. most of these stories are extremely sexual in nature and most are blatantly pornographic in nature. these stories enlived many women and gave birth to their sexual imaginations. in continually searching for more things of this nature online many women ended up coming across a little blog by the name of Twitarded.

begun Jan. 15th 2009 by two women who go by the names of Jenny Jerkface and Snarkier Than You. i DO know their real names, but since a woman's real name is about the most intimate thing these women can share with one another i will not violate that trust here. this blog is THE Twilight blog for this neighborhood. hence the name "Twitardia" for this grouping of blogs. this blog has over 1500 followers, posts daily, and is a massive, MASSIVE gathering of fun, wit, sarcasm, and smut. it has grown so big, the comments so numerous, and the emails of admiration and fangirlness that it has begun to take over the lives of JJ & STY. so recently they added a 3rd partner named Latchkey Wife (aka LKW).

it is what i have dubbed the Ellis Island of Twitardia. women end up tumbling down the rabbit hole and finding them. they come in search of a new land for this new life they have found for themselves. they are given a new name, become acclimated for a while, and eventually go forth into the new land of promise to stake their own claim.

when i found this group of blogs through Erin, at her behest, they were a group whose postings consisted largely of excitement about upcoming Twilight events (movies, soundtracks, ruminations over the books), varying sexy pics of the male celebrities, sexual stories, comments filled with what they call "smexiness" (smutty sexiness) and lots of game playing. they love to do things as a big group, play games with one another, and Fridays are big days for that. things such as Fact or Crap, Drunk Mad Libs, and the Friday Fun Five (a post in which a guest bogger asks the group 5 questions and everyone answers.)

this is enough for now i think. this is just a little background on the place. i will return however with the introduction and evolution of Mr. Pantz, how i got there, how i got sucked back into the bloggy world, and why i feel like god had the Mad Hatter tumble down a rabbit hole of his own into a world filled with much shaded pain and many troubled marriages...

heeeyyyy, youuuuuu guuuuuuuuyyyyyyyyys!!!!!!!!

2010-05-31T16:47:00.000-07:00

Loooong time no talk! probably confused by the profile, but that is my new bloggy name and my new bloggy face in my new bloggy neighborhood. this is jON!!!!!! lots been happening. in fact, my life bears absolutely no resemblance whatsoever to my life the last time we spoke. which is a VERY VERY good thing. i cannot believe or contain all of the blessings that are being poured out on us right now. but i don't have time. busy job, busy family (we just bought a house!!!!!), and the rest is being eaten up by my new bloggy life. i tumbled down the rabbit hole into another neighborhood filled with women who are absolutely addicted to the Twilight books, movies, and actors contained therein. Not my cup of tea, but Erin(my wife) introduced me to them and I got sucked back into (blog). Now, tonight, at midnight American Central Standard time I will be launching my blog The Hubtard live for the first time and wanted to invite you all to drop by and check out the fun. I have been posting little pop culture clips for the past month but tonight is my first real post. It will certainly be something else... compared to something else... but i would love to have you all over again. so, if you've got nothing better to do and poking yourself in the eye with a stick is out, maybe you'll want to pop in and see what's up? LOVE to hear from all of you again!!!!

here's the link: The Hubtard

love you all and hope that life has been just as kind to you and yours as it has to me and mine.

Tyler Dawn

2010-04-13T23:35:00.000-07:00

Just a quick note. Wanted to pop in here and say Happy Anniversary and hope that the move to California is going well!

Love ya sweetie!!

hello! sunday brief (well not so brief actually)

2010-03-21T15:00:00.000-07:00

hello friends! So how is everybody?! Wondering about Tyler, Jon...
I know I haven't posted here in a very long time... (I disappeared for almost a year... you can read my blog for those of you who don't know...)
Anyway, I got this random devotional in my inbox from DaySring and, though a bit cheesey, I thought it was encouraging. It kinda made me think of you all "foul weather friends." Is there really any other kind of friends?- Maybe all-weather friends.

How Can We Walk Through Life's Rain With You?

I wish I had a big red umbrella that would keep all the rain out of your life. I would hold it over your head and the drops would splash, splash and you would never even feel them.

But I don't have a big red umbrella...so I'll walk through the rain with you.

God doesn't intend for us to go through our storms alone. We all need our "foul weather friends" who will venture out into the weather with us.

There are two questions we must answer to not only survive but thrive through life's storms;

Who will walk through the rain with us? And will we let them?

Friends love through all kinds of weather. Proverbs 17:17 MSG

Devotional quote from the 365 Day Inspirational Calendar, Rain on Me based on the book, by Holley Gerth.

I'll share my latest-
We are in the process of moving to Arizona at end of the month. My husband hasn't yet found a for sure full-time job. A couple prospects and many opportunities. But prayers are indeed needed. I know some of you have been mindful of us, and we are so thankful! Please continue to keep us in your prayers. We also have to find a new home and we will be staying with my brother until then. The job really has to come first!?!
Also, we'll be traveling with two cats for a 24 hour drive- NOT straight through, mind you. It could be interesting. I've been reading about it... Many people say kitty tranquilizers are usually in order. I was thinking more like people tranquilizers...
Well, I'm actually fairly peaceful at the moment. We had a good family time praying together this morning- totally unplanned- those are the best. We really realized how much we need to daily lean/trust the Spirit, who has the life we need in spite of the insanity- give us each day our daily bread... The blood still washes and makes new. (Not trying to sound religious- It's just true. sometimes i can forget)

Sitting Down

2010-02-26T09:39:00.001-08:00

:sigh:
Hi guys...

Can I just come sit down here for a bit?

Thanks...

Happy Birthday Erin

2009-12-29T09:45:00.000-08:00

Happy Birthday to you
Happy Birthday to you
Happy Birthday dear Erin.......
Happy Birthday to you!!!

Spammers

2009-12-25T15:43:00.001-08:00

I have a feed set for comments on this blog so the new comments all go into my reader. We have now come under the attack of spammers and advertisers. I still don't see any reason to moderate comments here, but I will remain watchful for these types of comments making it in here and will add the senders to the blocked list when possible.

Merry Christmas to everyone!

Mike

Happy Birthday Sue

2009-12-01T07:44:00.001-08:00

Peace for Jon

2009-11-16T11:08:00.000-08:00

Many here know Jon, who started this site. He had embarked on a new journey of a tough new job. He recently is struggling with some things that has his spirits very low. If you could say a prayer of support for him, it would be greatly appreciated. It is one of the things that we felt a loss of when our father died. Every day he prayed for each and everyone of us, his children. That love and devotion of Him is missed sadly, but it was felt. Only as a loss when it was gone, for it was always there when he was alive. But Jon would greatly appreciate the prayers. Thanks.

Heading Back into Community

2009-11-13T17:48:00.000-08:00

Hey everybody,

I am thinking seriously about heading back into some sort of Christian community and oh, boy, it doth open up all sorts of worm cans :) It scares me so much!!

The man I was talking to regarding this was very understanding and it's been quite heartwarming. The plan was to go and meet up with these people in their regular Wednesday night meal they all share together. Woke up on Wednesday with 148 different kinds of fears running round my head. It felt almost sort of demonic, actually. Creepy, you know?

And I thought, "Wow, boy, okay. These fears are pretty strong and so I need to unpack them a little," rather than just wanting to breeze into something. I have this tendency to just shove down my disquiet sometimes and it's not to be borne, I'm afraid. The part of me that rocks is too enamoured with reality and groundedness for me to just go into something without dealing with these fears and talking to Papa about them.

So it's been an interesting few days for me. I have really reasserted to myself that I am in fact some sort of a contemplative (which is really no surprise) and that what I am scared of is that going into some sort of community I will feel coerced by the pace and doingness of the other people in the group. That I will find myself doing things that I don't actually want to do simply because everyone else is doing them and that they are good things, you know?

It's so scary, feeling this fear (often quite subconscious) that to be a part of a group you somehow have to lop off parts of yourself and do things differently than the rhythm of your life says (and the Spirit breath says). It has been all kinds of interesting to begin to separate the strands of what it means for me to be myself within community, with the desire to be part of something bigger than myself and to be in a space of loving and being loved. Combine that with those "deny yourself" phrases that Jesus spoke and it's no wonder that so many of us have struggled with maintaining ourselves within communities. We thought that Jesus' words were all about lopping off parts of yourself to fit in, but these days I tend to think that he was referring to those big ego parts of ourselves, the parts that wish to be powerful, to lord it over others, to be right, to be superior, to be always utterly in control.

And so yes, I'm happy to deny myself in those ways. Well, happy to an extent (my ego hates and fears it). But alongside it I'm also terrified. Because giving up control sometimes feels very much like opening yourself up to be abused, and I've had enough of that in my life that sometimes I still get the two mixed up - maybe not so much in my mind, but stll sometimes in my heart. Enough to send me into near panic at the thought of getting involved in community, something which I pant for on the other hand.

Ahhh, paradoxes :)

(And BTW this group is particularly understand of all of these sorts of thoughts. They do not pressure people to get involved beyond what they wish. It actually seems ultra fluid and about relationships rather than pandering to some created structure. It's all exciting ... but still totally scary too).

Saddened By The Silence

2009-10-09T20:01:00.000-07:00

This is mainly for Tyler Dawn, but also for anyone else that comes here. This was to be a place that we could come together to find support from our communtiy that we had formed. I do not meed much support at the moment, but am more than willing to give it. But I have been saddened by the silence. What had started out so vibrantly, has started to shrivel and die. I thought that by putting anything on here to get any discussion going again might be good. Revive it a little. But like any relationship that has value, it needs to be worked for. So I will commit to coming here regularly to give support to any asking, and would ask that we could get the same commitment from others that are willing. We ALL need support from time to time, and this community has helped me through some very tough ones. The loss of my father, Jobs, high stress situations, and for that I am forever thankful. My hope is that we can keep this place of sanctuary going for all of those that may need it.

Apologies

2009-10-03T02:01:00.000-07:00

Didn't mean to offend you ... I have removed the posts

My apologies

Hope you and yours get well soon

taking my leave

2009-09-29T14:17:00.000-07:00

hey guys, I realise no one comes here much anymore, and i see that it has pretty much become a bully pulpit and a sounding board where things that would normally be put on personal blogs are showing up.

This started out as a support group and then it died off, but i came here today seeing health reform being pushed/clarified/whatever, and seeing just stuff that has not much to do with coming together and supporting each other so I am taking my name off the roll. I just don't feel comfortable having the rahab's Kitchen logo on my blog saying this is a safe place for a hug and a cookie to have someone come and find political stuff.

I love you all, i just can't deal with all of this anymore. This was a place to love each other, and i thought this stuff was for our personal blogs. I for one have a full plate of grief right now and came here wanting to share, but this feels partisan and feels negative. I have enough of that right now with a houseful of swine flu and a bunch of other stuff i would not want to discuss here with the way it looks.

Providence

2009-08-09T20:10:00.000-07:00

I quit my job in Savannah, GA, because I hated it, and Savannah. But I had a real feeling of peace about it. It only took two weeks in this economy for me to get another job. One that I did not apply for. One where I did not know anyone. But they still called me. That is called providence, and for that I am thankful.

immediate intercession, please

2009-07-24T07:45:00.000-07:00

hey, gang. not sure if anyone gets back here at all anymore, but i am sending out the word that your prayers are needed. my sister-in-law has miscarried several times and is pregnant again. she recently found out that although the baby still has a heart beat, her uterus is filling with blood and it doesn't look good. nothing short of a miracle will save her, so ask for one. thanks.

The best birthday present EVER!

2009-07-15T16:15:00.000-07:00

Tomorrow morning I will be coming out of an extended time of prayer and fasting, where I had chosen a few things that were near and dear to my heart to really concentrate on. Well, today is my 40th birthday and I got a call in response to one of my most heartfelt prayers -- my sons are getting the sibling they have been praying for over the last year.

Our beautiful birthmother Stephanie is 4 weeks (2 weeks) pregnant after battling secondary infertility (the inability to conceive a second pregnancy)! And she is due on the boys' birthday! I am just praising God that she and her husband Ryan are being so abundantly blessed!

Andy came to me about a year ago and told me, out of the blue, that he was praying for a baby sister -- and I told him he had to talk to his Mamma Stephanie about it.

I am on cloud 9 tonight!

Happy Birthday Tyler Dawn

2009-07-15T10:20:00.000-07:00

Happy Birthday Sweetie. I hope it's a great one!!

Hello Out There?

2009-05-06T13:05:00.000-07:00

So, what has happened to our little community? It seems to have fizzled out. I'm just curious...are we all too busy? Has facebook taken over our computer time? Are we all heading in different directions now on this journey? I believe it is all of the above for me. The weather is warm enough to play outside, and my kids demand much of my attention. The little time I seem to have squeezed out for myself has all but disappeared these days. I hope you are all doing well.

Good news and bad news

2009-03-31T09:05:00.000-07:00

The bad news is that Buddug, my favourite ferret, died last night.

The good news, for those who've been praying for me, is that I've found out that my job is safe, as someone else has taken voluntary redundancy.

Needless to say, I have rather mixed emotions at the moment.

prayer please

2009-03-09T08:24:00.000-07:00

well, we had a HUGE historical tree (100+ yrs old) in our back yard fall down yesterday... It is massive (I will post pictures on my blog soon!) It was intensely windy and I can't believe it fell down... It is SO shocking how it was uprooted... Anyway, it damaged some of our neighbor's property but not much really! No one was hurt, thankfully, and our house was miraculously intact. (The wind was so strong I remember saying a prayer off the top of my head, "God, keep us safe..." and he did!)
Please pray the insurance will cover the removal costs, etc. It is bound to cost A LOT and we honestly can't afford it...
Thanks

2009-03-02T05:04:00.000-08:00

This seems like such a flippant request in comparison to what everyone is going through. This question is for my Australian friends: I've just recently come out of country hibernation and moved to Canberra, and was wondering whether any of you were aware of any possible communities that would be worth looking into? I am strangely hanging out for some person-to-person again.

Thanks so much guys. Will keep all of you in my prayers.

Happy Birthday Ruth!!!!

2009-02-24T18:50:00.001-08:00

Saturday/ Sunday briefs (updates?)

2009-02-21T10:22:00.000-08:00

Hey everyone (... it's already Sunday in Australia)
I haven't been around an awful lot, but going through many blogs, I've noticed I'm not the only one...we've all got stuff on our plate... or is it that facebook is hijacking all the bloggers... damn them (JK)
so how is everyone...?

Redundancy looms

2009-02-13T09:37:00.000-08:00

(Cross-posted from my blog)

I work in a primary school in South Wales which teaches children aged 4-11.

Yesterday we were told that, due to falling pupil numbers, it will be necessary to make two teachers redundant this year. It could be any of the ten of us who aren't part of the school's senior management team who get the chop.

The atmosphere of the school has now totally changed. People have been close to tears, everyone is worried about their futures and staff morale and motivation have gone out of the window. None of us want to be made redundant, but equally none of us want to see two of our colleagues - people we like and respect - get the axe either. We're all in a lose-lose situation here.

Prayer would be appreciated. The final decision on who is to be made redundant, assuming nobody volunteers, will be made on March 11th.

And so it goes

2009-02-05T06:37:00.000-08:00

(cross posted from my blog)

Two days ago saw the hospitalization of my otherwise healthy (and young) mother. I'm not going to share details at this point, suffice to say they found a previously undiagnosed and unexpected, chronic problem. I will say it is a very good thing she got to the hospital when she did, because it could have resulted in something much worse than the miserable symptoms she's been having and the treatment she will now face. I'm thankful she's alive and has a great prognosis for recovery, with time.

However, of course, this has been difficult for me, a great sense of frustration that this was not diagnosed earlier, considering how much time she has spent at the Dr. these last few months. I'm frustrated that she had to become so ill before something was done. I'm frustrated that the amount of stress she's been under these last few years is a significant contributing factor, and like any good firstborn I keep wondering if there was something I should have done to help prevent it, or at least I should have realized something was wrong much sooner.

Of course, her symptoms have been somewhat mysterious these last few weeks, seeming very much like one thing, but then turning out not to be that at all. Dad and I both said now that we KNOW what's going on, it makes perfect sense and we both are kicking ourselves for not realizing it much sooner, even a year or two ago. I think maybe we didn't want to face the possibility.

In any case, I'm carrying a new weight around right now, and may not be as present as usual until things return more to normal. I appreciate your prayers for her recovery. Please pray for dad as well. Thanks all!

Greetings friends!

2009-02-03T11:23:00.000-08:00

I really don't have much to say -- I was just missing everyone. So.. HI!
I hope everyone is healthy, emotionally and physically. That's all for now. :-)

Update...

2009-01-28T16:53:00.000-08:00

Well, I still don't know what is going to happen. I am trying to work up the courage to apply for a debt consolidation/reduction loan. Crunching the numbers. I don't see how they will give me one. But...

This has shaken my confidence. A lot of issues trying to fight for dominance....

For those of you that have sent me help, you know who you are... THANK YOU!!!

Kenya

2009-01-27T03:32:00.000-08:00

Hey guys this is not a request for personal prayer but for an entire country. Alomost 6 years ago my hubby went to Kenya on a missions trip. Here he met a pastor called Aamos. Aamos lives in Nirobi slums with his family and does his best to in rich those around him whilst struggling to survive himself. He just popped up on my facebook chat thing and I did the socially acceptable thing and asked him how he was. He proceeded to tell me that Kenya is in the grip on a huge famon and 1000s die everyday and that he and his family are on the brink themselves. What do you say in response to that other than I ll pray. I feel usless and like a rich fat cat! Please can you pray for this country and this man

thx

songs you're still sick of

2009-01-25T01:23:00.000-08:00

maybe you haven't heard it in 5, 10 or even 20 years, but after the first few notes you know without a doubt... it hasn't been long enough. i thought this would be fun, and after the past few months, i think we all could use a little fun. :-)

i'll get us started.

Help?

2009-01-22T19:38:00.001-08:00

Hmm... this hard. The tape running in my head says, "You made this mess, you clean it up. And don't expect any help."

I'm not doing so well. A mistake from my past that wasn't handled well - financial - is biting me in the ass right now. And it seems to have pretty big teeth. If things go the way I was told on the phone this morning, the government could be taking 30% of my income starting next month. Which would make it so that I couldn't pay my bills.... Could you all think of me when you're praying? Thanks.

My husband just got fired

2009-01-22T11:23:00.000-08:00

I really didn't see this coming. But he got fired this afternoon. Please pray for us i don't know what we are going to do.

Update: Sunday morning

Okay so yesterday we get a phone call from somebody who works there. Mark's firing WAS THE BEST THING THAT COULD HAVE HAPPENED to that place. Finally, years of putting up with good people being terminated for no reason has gotten to be too much and people are angry and there are the beginnings of a riot going on. His boss had a meeting with the mechanics and their words were, "What did we do that was so awful that you fired our boss?" Well, I don't know about you, but there aren't many people I know who would say that. I haven't ever had a boss I was willing to say that about/ in defense of. The other supervisors now know that they aren't safe because they looked up to him in a big way for doing the right thing and never giving in to the bullying. The people on the floor are furious because Mark always supports them in their jobs (he even helps the linemen with placing product back on the lines as he is evaluating the lines).

On friday morning Abba said to me, "This is not over." He said it over and over again and I did not understand.

It doesn't mean Mark's boss gets fired and Mark gets rehired but Abba is right, this is NOT over. The person who called was devastated about it on thursday but now feels that it is the single best thing God could have allowed to happen.

Yesterday God reminded Mark that He always gets the bills paid and that things were going according to plan and suddenly I am super excited to see how this turns out.

Love to you all!

this is zaavan.

2009-01-21T07:32:00.001-08:00

as promised, here is zaavan, my son. he's 6 years old and has severe CP and MR. in laymen's terms, that's Cerebral Palsy and Mental Retardation. his other diagnoses are quadraparesis and microcephaly.

effectively, he cannot eat, drink, change, move, toilet... anything on his own. he requires hours of care. but that's not any different from any other kid. the attention and cares needed are just different. but, as you can imagine, it is well worth it. he is one of the best people i've ever met. i am constantly amazed that a boy with so many challenges can be the most joyful person i've ever known. he is one blissed out kid. in fact several are the nights when he wakes up laughing. and laughing and laughing and laughing. at nothing. at least, nothing that we can tell. but i have often suspected that he is able to sense things we can't.

being his dad has been nothing short of life changing. i am no longer the person i was when he was born. i have learned so much about how to communicate with people through learning how to communicate with someone who is not able to communicate through conventional means. (i.e. words) i blogged about that once before already.

every parent is different, but i know that coming to terms with zaavan was actually a quick process for me. we first got the news hours after his birth in the middle of the night. a massive seizure sent him into respitory arrest and he had to be intebated and moved into the NICU. it was thus the roller coaster began and i knew that something had to die. and what had to die were my expectations that i had for zaavan and who i hoped and dreamed he might be. he was as he is and there was no going back. nothing could change it. so i could either continue to grieve for something that never existed or i could simply accept zaavan as he is, no strings attached. i chose the latter and am glad i did. i have, of course, been overwhelmed several times at the challenges he faces, and the times when i have had to prepare myself for the possibility of his death when it has gotten bad. each time, however, he has pulled through. over and over again, grace seems to be the theme in this kid's life and i am glad to be privy.

and i am especially grateful for the near-deafening roar that went up into the spiritual ether on his behalf when i shared our challenges on december 1st. it certainly is a neverending stream of challenges. but it is also a never ending stream of overcoming those challenges, or learning how to be grateful for what we have been given. which is pretty cool.

this is zaavan. he is my perfect son, and i love him.

What's Been Happening

2009-01-17T23:38:00.000-08:00

Hello Everyone.

I know that my appearances lately have been sparse; not only here but on line and in my own blog as well. Most of you who follow my blog have seen a "turn" in the direction of my writing and me questioning pretty much everything that I have come to know as true in the past year or so. So now, I can come out and tell you what has been happening.

This past week has seen two very "huge" changes in my life. The first is that I started a new job with a new department this week. Big change for me but the timing is perfect when taken into consideration of where I want to go with my career. Secondly, on last Tuesday, I was divorced from my wife. This has been a decision that I have been agonizing for the better part of a year and I finally came to the conclusion that enough was enough. The hardest part, as you might imagine, was my beautiful son and the thought of not being around him all of the time but in the end, it just wasn't enough. Our split was amicable and so were the arrangements that we agreed on with respect to custody and visitation and I am so thankful for that.

You all have been a great source of support for me and I am thankful that I have this family to share with when things are good and to lean on when things are bad. There are a few loose ends yet to tie up so if you feel so led, ask a prayer that what I have to do next (regarding our home) goes smoothly.

My brain

2009-01-15T15:26:00.001-08:00

Guys, I have been quiet lately because of health problems, I had a TIA yesterday morning and they have me on hormones that are literally driving me crazy :(

Update: Valorosa asked why I am on hormones so here goes --

I am estrogen dominant because my ovaries only make a few hours of progesterone a month, instead of weeks. This is why I miscarry, well, one of the reasons. Unopposed estrogen is very dangerous and is a chief cause of strokes in young women. When i was 27, in response to some other issues, I was placed on birth control pills and had a severe TIA within a few days -- one that left me greatly impaired for 6 months and which still has left me with some memory loss and well mucked up my handwriting. They took me off of the pills but because of a misdiagnosis the same thing happened two years later. Please think of what happened to me the next time someone tells you that prescribing BC pills to teens without prescreening or parental consent is a good thing -- it happens more than they admit.

Now, I am not on BC pills right now but I am in peri-menopause and i think I am getting estrogen bursts that might have caused this. So I am on a progesterone cream to oppose the estrogen.

Thanks for all the prayers. I love you guys. I am like the wicked witch of the west over here. My poor kids.

Sustaining Concern

2009-01-13T09:55:00.000-08:00

Thanks to all of you who have dropped by my blog and left messages for me. I am sorry I have not written here, but I do read when I can to keep up with what's going on with you. Things have been difficult for me due to my son's drug addictions - two hospitalizations in the last three weeks, outpatient rehab, counseling, school expulsion and trying to keep up with my job.

Sometimes its the words of others that keep me going. I am a word person so every comment left feels like a warm hug, a shot in the arm of Vit B-12, an empathetic smile or a pep talk. Thank you.

Also, I don't know how to post here as "Prodigal Daughter" and am starting to freak out about my blogs being so interconnected and may have to do something "drastic" but am not sure what. I want my anonymity back!

Prayer Request

2009-01-12T15:40:00.000-08:00

This sounds strange - even the title, since I have struggled so much with asking God for things and how that all works, but I'll just put it out there...

My sister's husband leaves for Iraq today. They just moved to Hawaii and they have 2 preschool aged boys. One is only 13 months old. It is a little harder for my sister this time since she's so far away from family and has not been there for very long. If you think of our military, or have time to pray for my sister and her husband, their names are Kim and John. John is a captain in the USMC/infantry something or other, so he's always right in the middle of the craziness, wherever it may be.

Thanks guys...
Kari

Hi Dwellers

2009-01-12T03:14:00.000-08:00

I haven't posted anywhere in a while. I don't think I've left many comments around either. I'm still here - don't delete me! I've made some life decisions lately, all of which are focused primarily on myself and my kids being ok. What I mean by that is that I'm too damn tired and frustrated to bring my marriage into my decision making processes. If I'm married or single, none of my decisions are affected either way.

I'm talking with a contractor to get a floor plan finished up and have a house built on the front of this family owned property. Since October I've been trying to decide if I should add on to this existing house or build a new one. The costs are close in comparison. So - new house it will be. My oldest son will be 9 in a few months and he and his brother and sister are all still in the same bedroom. Enough's enough.

I never finished my college degree. I wanted to be a teacher but early on in my married I was convinced that wasn't the best option - that I should get a business degree. My job was in a loan department in banking at the time and I was good at my job so I changed my major. The problem is, I didn't WANT to do that. So I've never put much effort or desire into finishing the degree. If I turn up single, I don't want to have to work 12 hrs a day and miss being a mom just to pay bills. Without a degree, that's what will happen (at best). So I start back to college this morning. I changed my major back to education. It'll take me over two years to finish since I won't go full time. I can't. I'm still working and trying to be with the kids when they're home from school. Saturday night we had another major blow up and my husband left... again. Yesterday I had decided "screw it... I can't emotionally do all of this and balance college on top of it". But I've regrouped. I can't sit here in this house and be consumed by all of this junk anymore. Hopefully going regardless will get my mind onto other things that don't wind up with me going to bed for the day.

That's my update and I'm sorry I've been so sparse. I think I've just run out of meaningful things to say for a while.

Covering and Authority

2009-01-07T17:04:00.000-08:00

Just letting you know about a fairly new website I found called Covering And Authority. It's by LT of The Heresy. It's extremely informative for anybody who has or knows somebody who has suffered from spiritual abuse. It also gives some extremely biblical reasons why the "covering" doctrine is false.

I'm glad to see important websites like this one springing up.

Northwest Folk

2009-01-07T11:35:00.000-08:00

Are you guys ok? Just saw all of the flooding out there...looks pretty bad. Avalanches? Just wanted to see how you all were. Please update us! I'm worrying...

Prayer for Matt

2009-01-05T22:56:00.000-08:00

HI all
Firstly let me wish you all a great 2009!
I was wondering if you could pray for my Hubby his name is Matt. For about 5 years he has been running his own web development business. He was not encouraged at all by our former pastor (the opposite infact) and suffers from a lack of self worth becasue of it. But he is brilliant at what he does. Any way he has decided to give his business one last chance to be able to support him full time and make money so until June 2009 he will be basically working 2 full time jobs. His business and the his salaried job, Means very long hours and lots of stress. We also want to plant a house church this year sometime. I am worried firstly about Matt overloading himself and secondly if it fails to meet its goal by June what are the consequences? I couldnt sleep last night for worrying about it.
I guess I need peace that it will be ok no matter what the outcome but I cant bare to see him hurting and am petrofied that he will crumble if it doesnt work.
Thx guys

roll call

2009-01-05T22:11:00.001-08:00

Thoughts

2008-12-31T20:00:00.001-08:00

I wrote a post on my blog earlier today along the lines of what Jon was writing about before he disappeared... (just kidding, I know he's around here somewhere..., coming back soon, right?) Anyway, thought I'd share... None of us out here (in what they call the "wild") should feel all alone in our inevitable pain, I know that much... I know pain makes us feel that way, but does it have to be so alienating? I don't think so. Maybe I'm wrong, but I don't see that in the gospel....

I also have a question...
What about the Lord's supper...?

http://graced-all-over.blogspot.com/

Please Pray!

2008-12-29T20:38:00.000-08:00

Please pray for Barbara and her son Keven tonight. I will leave it up to her to share more than that if she wishes, but I don't think she'll mind me asking on her behalf.

It's very important.

Thank you!

Happy Birthday

2008-12-28T23:13:00.001-08:00

Erin
December 29th

Happy Belated Birthday Mike!

2008-12-28T15:21:00.000-08:00

We missed your birthday, Mike. I s'pose you get that sort of thing all the time, huh? Missed birthdays? Combined birthday and Christmas presents? :)

Stuffed up head

2008-12-27T15:50:00.000-08:00

Back from Chicago, with a head cold, in more ways than one.
All in all, we had a pretty good time. We did something different-- got away for the holiday to define our own identity as a family more, just the three of us. It was a good step for us. A couple family members did not understand us leaving at this time, but that's the way it goes. We did what we needed to do. We are not overly fond of repetitive traditions that lose their meaning, because the tradition itself becomes more important than what it supposedly celebrates. What IS celebrated, anyway? Is it a facade to appear as though we are indeed close, when in fact we aren't?
I know this isn't true for all, but for many, it is.
It can all be so confusing for me, and I'm sure I'm not alone in this. Can't we just do away with the whole thing? What's the purpose anymore? I know, each person can chose for themselves...? But can they, really? What would you say to someone who is not celebrating Christmas? What would you think? Aren't people free to just not do it. Hardly. We chose to "flee" to Chicago, while we try to figure it out...
So the three of us gladly gave one another a few gifts, played games and sang some songs.
As far as the whole shabang is concerned, i still felt some dreadful guilt, and that is why I hate the whole thing. I felt pressure to participate, well, rather, to make it happen; why do I need to try harder during "Christmas?" It just goes against the gospel. It doesn't have to be that way, I know. The pressure was internal... trying not to feel guilty for saying NO to certain people.... We did something different but there was a cost.

It seems every year Christmas comes sooner and is more dreadful each time. Am I doing something wrong? Am I too fearful to just say I'm not doing it this year? Why is it all so freakin' confusing? I think part of it is because I have swallowed the blue pill, and nothing is as it once was and there is no going back. Deconstructing from foolish religious practices has it's price. Christmas season can be one of those heavily confusing periods... so many memories and expectations around it, not too unlike deconstructing from Churchianity... so that is why my head is all stuffed up. Can anyone else relate? ( I'm not asking for answers to all these questions...)
Pray for me...
thank God it's all over with for now

Missing child

2008-12-26T15:24:00.001-08:00

My twins' friend has gone missing. He is 8 years old and has mild disabilities and never met a stranger. He has been gone since this morning and usually shows up at our house BUT DID NOT. He is usually here by 10 am.

Please pray.

Holiday Reading

2008-12-25T21:36:00.000-08:00

I'm on holidays. Woo-hoo. Part of that involves reading great swathes of books. How luxurious can you get? I've been to the library, got some nice novels sitting here. Also in the middle of reading The Agony and the Ecstasy by Irving Stone, a fictionalised account of the life of Michaelangelo, which is kinda interesting. I'm also reading Women Who Run With the Wolves, which I'm pretty enamoured with and have been blathering on about at my blog here if you're interested in joining the conversation.

Anyone else reading anything interesting lately?

I Am Second

2008-12-23T14:38:00.000-08:00

Through LA Ink of all places, I became aware of this place. "Head" of KORN, was on LA Ink getting a tattoo. LA Ink is one of my daughter's favorite shows. She became interested in Brian "Head" Welch because of his appearance there. He spoke about his life as a guitarist for KORN, how he had become a father and a drug addict. The baby mama died and he had sole custody, and what type of father he was. This lead Lexi to search him out on the web. She found this testimony from Brian. Brian is the scariest looking guy on the screen. But his experiences are very powerful. Please check out other stories there, but make sure to check out Brian's.

Merry Christmas

2008-12-21T07:35:00.000-08:00

I'm currently suffering with 'flu, so my forays into Blogworld may be limited for a while to the times when I'm feeling slightly less crappy.

Anyway, in case I don't post much over the next few days, I'd like to wish you all a happy Chanukah and a merry Christmas.

Please pray for my son

2008-12-18T16:40:00.000-08:00

I feel bad showing up here after not really being around much lately, but I am desperate.
I shared a while back that my son was using drugs. I thought he stopped (he did stop for a while). To make a long story short, he's shooting up cocaine. I found out today when his school called to tell me that they had him detained in the office, with a cop, because his teacher thought he looked high. He was coming down from last night.

I knew something was wrong and I think I knew, but was in denial. I asked him daily and he lied to me, I chose to believe the lies even though all signs pointed to drugs.

So, eh's suspended and will most likely be expelled (the principal is recommending that). His life took a sharp turn today and he's not a happy person.

I am weary.

I can't force him to get help.

I don't know what to do.

So here I am, crying out to my Chrisitans brothers and sisters and asking them to cry out to God. I am even going to cry out to Him myself. I realize that its not my lack of faith in God that has kept me away from Him, but my anger. Lots and lots of anger.....and now this.

Do I get mad at God for it or do I turn to him in it? I want so desperately to believe...because if he's real, then he really can intervene and change my son.

Thanks for caring.

Boundaries (and update)

2008-12-15T14:47:00.000-08:00

Hey all

Well, my brother has not returned to my house. I am so grateful for that :) Thank you for your prayers. (As a reminder, he has been coming and going and staying with me for the past six weeks, and it's really disorientated me about a million times more than I thought it was. It took a while to realise how disorientating I found it, partially because I wanted to help him and partially because I have, I have further discovered, this strange irrational sense of responsibility for him. This is because of the dynamics of our family - we are playing out the roles our parents taught us to - and because of sexual abuse issues as children).

I am in an uncomfortable period in my life where I am seeing more clearly the necessity for boundaries. Growing more able to say "no", because I know that is my true answer, and to sit with the discomfort that comes afterwards, the silly guilt, the feeling of "I am a bitch because I said no", which unfortunately so many women have to deal with.

It is a difficult thing to learn to become the person you are intended to be, is it not? I think Christianity has inadvertently taught us that denying ourselves means repressing our intuition, especially for women. It has inadvertently taught us that we are not able to hear God for ourselves, nor are we allowed to hear ourselves for ourselves because that is a sin. I am glad to see this dysfunction beginning to be displaced from within the Body.

praying

2008-12-13T13:37:00.000-08:00

I posted this on my blog yesterday, but in case you didn't see it, I thought it might be worth posting here too. I was praying for a few of our situations this morning, and couldn't get this song out of my head. It seems to me, that while one of the things we love most about this kitchen is the understanding and compassion that we find here, there is something even greater than that for which we are truly seeking (and will find as we pray together for each other): the Presence and the intervention of the Lord in our lives. I am so grateful for the privilege of walking with you into His throne room and bringing our requests to Him.

I hope you are as encouraged by this song as I have been, for it truly is a prayer set to music.

Blessings,
Happy

The holidays /updates

2008-12-10T15:18:00.000-08:00

I know the holidays can be a very hard time for many people. Aside from the craze and insane materialism, there is also a lot of pressure and stress on folks having to deal with difficult family situations or family members, etc, and for others it can be a very lonely time.
I know this time is pretty hard for me. I deal with a lot of depression and grief during this time, most every year. Part of it is the mess of what remains of my childhood family, missing my mother... and also feeling like so much of it is a charade. But we try to make the best of it for my daughter, you know, build meaningful times.

So, how is everyone dealing with the holidays...? Are there some special situations we need to lift up in prayer. How can we pray for one another?

"The only thing worse....

2008-12-07T23:41:00.000-08:00

than being a special needs parent is not being one."

That has been my signature line as part of the Walt Disney World Special Needs visitor's forum for a couple of years now on a popular website.

While there I met a family about two years ago with a sick baby named Hayden who had a terminal prognosis. He was not supposed to live to his first birthday, but I was privileged to meet him at Mickey's Very Merry Christmas Party last year and gave him a kiss that I can quite literally still feel on my lips.

He died yesterday morning, and I feel as though my heart is smashed and broken in two. Please remember his parents Kyle and Eva in prayer, as they have lost their only child. We have all known this was coming for so long now, and I thought it would be easier, but I just find myself so steeped in grief.

A New Cabinet

2008-12-07T21:42:00.000-08:00

I found room on the outside of the cabinet next to the stove and added one for Study.

Thanks Barry.

I Feel Like a Complete Fraud

2008-12-07T21:36:00.000-08:00

For those of you who have not read my blog recently, I am going to put one of my posts here as well because right now I need some big time prayer from you, my friends here in the kitchen.

"Have you ever felt that you had absolutely no business blogging, writing, teaching or for that matter even talking about anything that has to do with God. That’s where I’m at today."

I feel like such a hypocrite...

A shameless plug

2008-12-07T15:03:00.000-08:00

This is a shameless plug for the Open Bible Blog. Feel free to take a look - it's basically what it sounds like, an open Bible study. Any opinions and any viewpoints are welcome, as is disagreement and debate as long as it is expressed with respect.

Anyway, I thought perhaps a few people from here might be interested in contributing to the blog. (Some are already on there.) If you want to be added to the list of contributors there (i.e. be able to post in your own right rather than just comment), email me at glan dot islwyn at btinternet dot com and I'll add you.

We're currently looking at Luke's gospel.

News

2008-12-06T16:46:00.001-08:00

(cross post from my blog)

I just received word today that a friend of mine has breast cancer. I don't believe any of you would know her, she's a real-life friend, but I'm still going to protect her privacy and not reveal any more details right now.

I write because I'm seeking any thoughts and prayers you might be willing to send out for her. I don't have any details at this point, she is still awaiting more information about her condition. She is supposed to be making a decision this weekend on treatment options, so prayers for peace and strength and the ability to make the right decision would be appreciated. Her faith is strong and she feels hopeful, but I know she would appreciate the prayers.

Thank you guys. Love you.

Getting To Know You, Getting To Know All About You

2008-12-06T09:19:00.000-08:00

Hello Everyone,
I have not posted here before, but one of the things that has been kind of intimidating is the fact that I don't know all that many of the folks here. So, I am going to go around to all of the blogs on the blog roll, and try to get to know everyone. Many have been sharing many of there stories here. Letting us get to know them. For that, I thank you for allowing us into your world, and trusting your emotionally well being into our care at times.

But in order to create a better understanding between myself and the others here, I am going to try to read the blogs that are on the blogroll. Trying to interact with you there, and get an idea of what each person that comes to the kitchen is like at home. I know myself, that I am very busy and do not post often, but will try to put some of the things that I have posted in the past up for people to read so that you can get to know me.

So this is an invitation of sorts to my house. There are cookies and milk placed out for nibblers. Just like I am waiting for Santa.
See you there,
Nate

change/ sorry

2008-12-04T19:59:00.000-08:00

I added something to what I posted yesterday a few posts down....

This is so hard to write

2008-12-04T01:26:00.003-08:00

I can't do it on my own blog because too many people I know read it and I'm not really ready to talk there yet.

My Mum just called. She's been diagnosed with Chronic Lymphocytic Leukemia. It seems it's in the early stages but she won't know for sure until she sees a specialist just after Christmas.

I've never been all that close to her, although I lived with her my entire childhood (my parents divorced when I was 9 and I stayed with her), but I don't know. This makes things seem different.

I'm crying but I don't really know why. I'm so sad for her, but I'm not so sure how to talk to her or what to say.

Sorry this is completely disjointed and probably doesn't make a lot of sense. I'm typing through tears. I just needed to say something to somebody.

Hey all

2008-12-03T14:33:00.000-08:00

I posted a long post on my blog, bearing out half my soul (and story) and wanted to invite you to come read and leave your feeback, if and when you can...
my story
Thanx and love

--------------------------
Also, for those who haven't already gone and commented, please comment here instead.
This is a safer place for me right now. I shared what I was ready to there at this point. I had to delete a couple comments there for privacy reasons I can't get into right now (but I kept them all in my e-mail box). I REALLY appreciated every comment and was in no way offended by anything you wrote. In fact, I was really encouraged, and thankful to share and get your feeback! I should have just asked for you to comment here in the first place... sorry

Thanks again

Zaavan's Needs

2008-12-01T19:24:00.000-08:00

Hi All
My hubby and I no longer tithe(infact we have decided that it is unbiblical)
but still believe in intentional giving to people with real needs and real faces (as oposed to the pasotrs new car or a bright and shiney new building for the church).
I really feel that God is saying that Zaavan's needs are just that

So I am going to give Jon an "offering" I am going to sow into my prayer that God will fix this utterley unacceptable situtaion.I know that the small amount I can give will not really change his situation in the physical but I beleive that soemtimes God ask us to be a part of the solution.

I am not posting about this so that I can recieve any pats on the back but instead to invite anyone who want to join me. No pressure intended, you dont need to answer this post I dont need to know it is between you and God and what he ask you to do. I only konow he asked me to give nothing more
So Jon I need a way to wire you some cash so be intouch

Happy Birthday

2008-12-01T16:31:00.000-08:00

Sue
December 1st

immediate intercession requested

2008-12-01T14:11:00.000-08:00

so we just found out that the county, for some unknown reason, has closed out our son, zaavan's, medical assistance. this is a HUGE deal as it was this assistance that paid for all of his anti-seizure medication as well as his food. he is tube fed and doesn't eat by mouth, but he is also on a specialized diet (the ketogenic diet) that requires specialized food for him. as of right now, he is no longer able to get ANY of these things. we only have about a week's supply of both food and meds left. please, please, please pray for us that this would get straightened out and SOON! thanks gang...

Strange days Indeed

2008-11-29T15:43:00.000-08:00

I should have written this about a week ago but that is the flu for you, it just leaves me braindead.

So I told you about the threat against Mark's job. Well, last sunday night I was just walking around minding my own business and I suddenly heard something from God (finally!).

It was a lie, they weren't going to fire him, they CAN'T.

So I told Mark about this and we started really praying and he felt a lot of peace. He went back to work confident and it totally drove his boss nuts! So anyway, thursday rolls around and Mark's corporate boss fesses up, out of nowhere, that they actually did not have the ability to fire him, they just wanted to -- well, manipulate him (he didn't say it like that of course, but that was the jist).

So the really awesome thing is that Mark has found two other out of church believers there who are praying blessings over the facility with him in the mornings and they are really seeing results. They are all department heads so this is really amazing.

And his boss is acting very strangely! Can't stand to be around my husband at all.

So anyway, thanks so much for holding us up in prayer, I really needed it. I am so grateful for all of you.

more on me

2008-11-27T17:17:00.000-08:00

I'm sorry to be so needy but.. here I am again.

My husband's Christmas party is coming up in two weeks and of course all of the co-workers will be there. He says that *their* relationship has calmed down and he tells her he's committed to his marriage and now they're friends but still good friends - more than I would prefer. Anyway, she'll be there and not only does he want us to meet, he thought it would be good for us three to meet prior to the official party, have some drinks, and break the ice. One moment I think I can manage that and be nice and bla bla and other moments I think "what?!... I can't handle that!"

I'm trying to be gracious here and understanding and all that stuff. Could anyone shed some light on this that maybe I'm not seeing -- either way? I would assume there would be a few "girl... tell him no!" with fingers snapping and stuff ;-).... but other than that. Could I actually be nice and gracious and confident and steady in the face of this?

Just to clear up any misconceptions that might arise from lack of words - no he isn't looking for a 3-way. He thinks that it would be more healthy for her to know me as well to break some of her connection with just him. He mentioned weeks ago that he'd know when she had let go of her ideal of him running away with her when she was ready to meet his wife. So CAN we be friendly? Am I just being insecure and petty when I think I'd rather go the rest of my life without meeting her?

I'm rambling... sorry. But thanks in advance.

Happy Thanksgiving!!!

2008-11-26T10:21:00.000-08:00

It's Thanksgiving here in the US of A... and I thought we could perhaps share a few things we are thankful for...
Wouldn't it be grand if we could all celebrate together : ) I imagine this grand kithen would produce such a marvelous feast...( but the fellowship would be the greatest part : )
Shall we have a cyber thanksgiving here?

Image from
http://www.guy-sports.com/humor/pictures/picture_thanksgiving.htm

Update

2008-11-24T21:09:00.000-08:00

Hi all,

If you've seen my blog, you've seen a song posted that my husband wrote. He's written several lately and put music to them. This is, I think, the fifth in line from him. It's important because, although it's not a promise, it's an apology for 18 years of lots of shit.

A brief synopsis of all of my brokenness lately is that on my birthday in September he forgot again. Maybe not forgot, but refused to acknowledge. That's typical of us. Something is important to me, his neurosis kicks in (fear of being controlled) and he withdraws. I wind up feeling abandoned. So.. after one more year among many of not being acknowledged in a special way I decided in my heart, "I'm done with this". That same week my step-grandfather passed away suddenly. That was tough and my husband was supportive, friendly but also realized I was making plans to move on with my health and my life. That same week a co-worker of his -- 21 yr old girl with a new baby and a failing marriage - called my husband to profess herself falling in love with him. Thus began the whirlwind.

My husband has been very honest throughout this whole ordeal - painfully so. At least I take comfort in the fact that I haven't been deceived. However, there have been many times I have been completely taken advantage of. Many would have thrown in the towel based on his feelings for this young girl 10 times by now. Three weeks ago I told him in all calmness, "I think we're done here" and I told him he should move out. He did not want this ordeal to cost him his family and was faced with the task of dealing with several internal issues of his own. Mind you, I am not perfect. However, my junk has been being dealt with for a while now. The task at hand became determining if we could be healthy and stay together or would we be more healthy as individuals to become individuals completely. We have three children; ages 8, 6 and 5. It would be huge adjustment to "try" separation for a while - obviously.

Throughout this process we have gone back to the beginning - why did we get married to begin with? Short answer: To be like *them* (people in our church circle). We thought we'd be the next *them*. Next we adopted ideas of *that couple* and tried to force each other into the ideal that went along with that -- never really recognizing who we were as individuals and the differences we held. If we did recognize it, we found fault in it. For example - when we first met, he loved how I didn't give a crap what anyone thought. Slowly, though, he convinced me that I should consider others way above myself and I became a neurotic little obsession in need of others approval which, yes, caused him to see me as weak. Our projections onto one another, thanks to religious roles, has completely sucked the life out of each of us.

Regardless of why we got married and what has kept us together (up until now, all religious reasons) we are still here and now have three children. So, instead of walking away completely we are trying to recognize each other for who we really are, deal with our own shadows and see if we can be healthy together or not. It's a one day at a time situation.

The work-girlfriend has died down some although the situation has come and gone quite a few times lately. I think the last piece of the puzzle was put to bed last week when 'chatting' became no longer an option outside of work. I thought that was settled long before last week but.. regardless... I think it's clear now.

Sixteen years of marriage and three kids plus lots of deconstruction has given room for growth and also provided many scary options. We still are walking together for now - we'll see how it all turns.

Many weeks ago I took off my wedding rings. The rings themselves were purchased out of urging from a friend in common (one of whom we idealized at the time) and everything those pieces of gold represent are no longer what I want a part of my life. I would like to happily wear a ring again but it won't be those - they represent what I don't want -- more of the same old forced compliance. He agrees.

We've tried our damnedest throughout all of this. If we can't move on together as friends, we'll have to attempt separating as friends. My mental weakness that occurs when we go to hell is not healthy nor is his neurosis flare-ups. We'll be healthy together or we'll be healthy apart. Either way -we love each other enough to want the best for each other; regardless of what that looks like in the near future.

All of that to say - if you've listed to the song on my blog - this update gives more back-story behind it. If you comment in detail about it, please do so here and not on my blog. He visits my blog but doesn't know about this site. I'm way more candid here.

Health (or the lack of it)

2008-11-24T13:04:00.000-08:00

Hello, fellow Kitchen-dwellers.

Could you please pray for my wife, Samantha, who was admitted to hospital today? She's due to have surgery (gynaecological laparoscopy) tomorrow morning. Please pray that the surgery will go well and that they'll find (and fix) what's been causing her so much pain over the past 5 months.

Also, for myself, the chest pain (costochondritis) came back yesterday :o( I do wonder if it's partly stress-related. It's not been too bad today, though the chest area is quite tender to the touch.

Any and all prayers - long, short, ongoing or one-off - are appreciated.

Bio

2008-11-24T09:48:00.000-08:00

Hey, all. I've been hanging around a bit, lurking, watching. Thought I'd add my name to the roll, so you could at least know who to blame if I step out of line. :) I've brought along the espresso machine and am serving up shots to anyone who wants them. I hand out coffee--lots and lots of coffee. My life has more or less been fueled by an obscene amount of coffee for the last fifteen years. Anyone want a latte?

Anyway, my name's Sara, and I'm a SAHM with 2 preschoolers and a grade schooler. My husband pastors a small Presbyterian church in the Midwest. I wrangle kids, and write, and try to get a bit of exercise . . . and think and pray and write and dream about how to work from right in the middle of the System to make the church-thing more what Jesus would want it to be.

I'm probably not likely to post very often, but know that I'm reading and thinking and praying and love being a part of the conversation.

Happy Birthday

2008-11-23T06:52:00.000-08:00

Dee
November 23rd

World Clock

2008-11-22T18:56:00.000-08:00

I really like that nifty little world clock. I think it's good to know what time it is if we are talking to someone. Does everyone want to list their time zones here so that we can add your names to the clock?

A Room for the Negatively Emotioned

2008-11-22T18:23:00.000-08:00

Hello Kitcheners

I have just added on a new room in the ever-expanding space that is Rahab's. It is a room painted in nice mental institutionalish soothing green tones, and set aside especially for those of us who are wallowing in the societally and christianityally displeasing sins like anger, bitterness, and crustiness in all of their forms. I call it the Pissed Off Room, which isn't very nice and pleasant a name at all, is it? But then, neither are those emotions :) Anger seems to be an emotion that freaks people out more than any other - and with good reason. How scary it is to see it in yourself, let alone in other people. But still, I think there is a space for it, for learning how to roll with it and harness it. I have this idea that the things that are making us angry can't really be overcome until we turn and walk into them and embrace them, to a certain extent. I would like the Pissed Off Room to be accessed by a slide from both the women's premenstrual verandah and also the men's wedgie deck, which goes down into a whole lot of balls, like they have in Ikea. I propose the walls be made of a nice splodgy substance which has plenty of give and take when you ram your head into them :)

I am doing a liver detox of sorts at the moment along with a heavy metal detox. My liver is quite overloaded and needs lots of supplemental support. It's all going okay and I'm not having a nervous breakdown or anything but I really do understand why in Chinese medicine the liver is considered the organ that deals with anger. Sometimes I wonder where all this anger in me comes from and sometimes I doubt it shall ever be dealt with. Which is where your prayers come in, if you feel so inclined. Some of you know that I have just come up out of the murk of 6+ years of chronic illness followed by a marriage breakdown. It's been two years now since my marriage broke up and I do definitely feel like I am healing. Sometimes, however, I get the feeling that I should be moving on more quickly than I am. But still, these things just can't be rushed and neither do I want to.

I am reading an interesting book at the moment called The Gift of Grief by a rabbi called Matthew Gewirtz which is a good read. One of the reminders I am taking away as I read it is that to be fully present to my own pain is really the only road through, even though at times that does feel unbearable, does it not, bloggers? But still, in my heretical meditation practices I do find that once turning and facing the anger or wahtever and really embracing it, in almost a physical way, brings such peace. What doesn't bring peace is the fact that I also feel crusty, old, grouchy and ultra critical at the moment, which is why if anyone wants me I'll be rolling around in the Ikea balls. Anyone else wanna join me? :)

a mental picture

2008-11-19T19:14:00.001-08:00

it's so great to stop and look around here and see what i see. everyone wearing their "work clothes", sleeves rolled up, paint smudges on their cheeks. mike using the table saw and drill to put up cabinets in the Kitchen. the air thick with the smell of baked goodness and coffee. just because the paint's not dry doesn't mean we're not able to operate...

it's a beautiful thing this Kitchen. to "look around" and see so many other great people who i've come to love and share intimacy with, right next to me, plugging away at a common goal. to give birth to something beautiful in this world.

this Kitchen can become anything we want it to be. decks, verandas... why not? we can have it all if we're willing to put in the hard work to make it happen. i think those are both great ideas and ones that deserve merit and contemplation. first things first, of course. but there's no reason why our vision can't go as far as the spirit can take it, eventually, if we're committed to it. i expect we'll continue to have to add on to the Kitchen as long as it keeps growing. i have no expectations for what it is or what it may become. i'm only curious to see what will grow after the sowing is done. :-)

yet, strangely, in that vein, i feel god asking me to put it down until the end of the year. to draw closer to him for a "closet" or "desert" season. to fast and pray. as well as step out of the way for a bit. and when i return, see what has grown in my absence. as well as share with you all about what i've heard in the desert.

i have one more post to put up at my place, then i'll be off. so here's some prayers and hugs in advance. as well as some esoteric advice and nostalgia inducing musical references just for fun.

much, much love to you all. you mean more to me than these simple letters arranged just so could ever tell.

you guys rock.

My husband

2008-11-19T15:26:00.000-08:00

It looks like my husband is losing his job. We just moved here in June, our fourth house in four years. I am exhausted, I just cannot keep doing this.

He moved into a company that puts in low quality equipment (years before Mark got there) and then demands that the engineering/maintenance manager make it work. Well, he can't, no one can. His boss demands that he be available 24/7 and that he come to the plant on every whim, even in the middle of the night.

Another move could ruin us financially, and Andy is finally doing well in school. I just do not know what to do. We did not want to come here, but God insisted, we knew this job would be trouble from the start, but we had peace about the move.

Anyway, I don't know what else to say.

Boundaries

2008-11-19T14:52:00.000-08:00

I am writing to ask those who have read my blog and understand the situation between me and my friend if they could give me some advice concerning boundaries...

I recently talked to my friend. She text me last night and sort of kind of tried to apologize to me, but yet the next second she turned around and told me she did not regret what happened and what she did and she felt she had to do it. Ever since my visit and through all that happened, I can see that she is quite a controller and she has a very aggressive personality, and I am quite the opposite to her. I am more of a passive/compliant person who has a rough time setting boundaries with anyone and would probably let anyone take advantage of me (getting better though), even if they are physically abusive towards me. I don't know if I should just forgive her like I have, and move on with life and continue to reach out to her, or should I set some kind of boundaries between us so that she won't control me in the friendship that we have left? Should I email her and let her know, or just let it go and move on... I somehow want to let her know that right now she and I can no longer be friends, but telling someone that what they are doing is hard for me to do.... Does she deserve an explanation for me not wanting to be a part of her life? In some ways I think she does and in other ways, I wish I didn't have to bite the bullet and tell her! Auhh, I don't know! Any help or advise in this situation would be greatly appreciated!!!

Hi

2008-11-17T20:01:00.000-08:00

Hi all, my name's Fiona (Fi), and while I'm not new to the online world, I am when it comes to the blogosphere. I'm 25 years old and live in country NSW in Australia. After attending a Christian arts college for 2 years, I gave it up to work in aged care, and am about to embark on a Literature degree which I have been waiting to do my whole life. I love cooking and following the Rubgy and Cricket and miss New Zealand where Iived a few years ago.

I've been hanging out with God since I was 21 and left the church institution almost 2 years ago. I've struggled with a whle lot of stuff in that time - doubt, fear, the judgment of others, and on many occasions have come close to giving it all up. The thing I have struggled with most is being able to maintain a sense of community, finding people who have shared my experience and wont judge me for the myriad ways in which I have messed up.

Some days I know unequivocally where I stand with my faith, and on others I wouldn't know where to start. What Idoknow is that it is an open ended dialogue, a journey of discovery, and I am grateful to Erin for extending me this generous invitation to share in the community you have here.

In pain and struggling

2008-11-16T16:10:00.000-08:00

Those of you who read my Honest Faith blog may remember that about this time last year I had a major health scare that turned out not to be life-threatening after all, but rather a very painful chest condition called costochondritis.

Well, at the end of October it came back. It's come and gone, but I have had to take time off work a few times because of it. Over the past week it's been particularly painful. I've been taking the same medication as last time, and it does help, but it doesn't always stop the pain.

On Friday it was particularly painful when I was in work, and I struggled to stay there. Perhaps I should have come home, because a teacher who can't focus on anything but the pain he's in isn't really an effective teacher at that point.

Anyway, my reason for posting this is that it's getting me down. I'm not in "uncharted waters" because I've had this condition before, but it's very painful and very unpleasant, and it's stopping me doing many of the things that I want/need to do (my wife is also very ill, and I need to take her to hospital appointments while doing all the household chores because she's currently unable to do much). Normal life, and many of my normal activities such as mountain biking, have had to go. I'm still able to go dancing on my good days, but I can't get out on my bike because whereas I can stop dancing if and when the pain returns, I can't just stop riding if I'm on a mountain track ten miles from home with no vehicle access. Plus, of course, this is affecting my work.

Prayer would be appreciated. Coping with my own illness as well as my wife's is a real struggle at the moment.

Happy Anniversary

2008-11-16T06:24:00.001-08:00

Dee

November 16th

Prayer for a Friend

2008-11-16T01:46:00.000-08:00

Will you guys/gals please pray for two women I know that are both caring for elderly parents? Diana is caring for her 94 year old father who is a cantankerous old dude who is mostly blind and deaf and can barely walk.

Sherry is caring for her 80 year old mother who is a dear, sweet woman but recently broke a leg and has various other medical issues including diabetes and some dementia.

These two women, Diana and Sherry, receive no help from ANYONE and they both struggle with health/pain issues of their own. Anyone who has had to be a caretaker knows how demanding and draining it can be, and how lonely.

Please lift them up in prayer. They are both faithful, loving women who know God and need his strength and encouragement to get them through.

Thank you so much!

Update

2008-11-15T19:04:00.000-08:00

Hi Everyone,

I'm using an update tag on this one because it serves two purposes.

First I am asking for your prayers. I can't go into detail but sometimes lately it seems like my entire world is coming unraveled and as such, it's really hard to keep my eye on God when all I want to do is forget about him sometimes.

Secondly, Tyler's game gave me a new idea for a label. Since board games are popular in most kitchens I know, I thought that was a good label for any games we might want to play.

Where I'm at right now

2008-11-14T21:17:00.000-08:00

My emotions are out of wack right now and I'm feeling a lot of anger, in general. A lot of it is hormonal... ( sorry men). Every month I battle really bad anxiety and anger issues related to my female cycle...please pray for me. It can last on and off for up to ten days!! It's just too long!! I get so angry and edgy. I control myself the best I can, by I get very cynical and kinda miserable. I don't want to talk to anyone... It's like this monster inside of me. I just got on some hormonal support like a month ago, but I don't know if it's helping! I don't know what to do.
Gosh, I don't really want any advice, especially to be told to be more positive... !
Please pray for me. Pray that if there are some legitimate issues I need to deal with, that God will show me and help me...I'm seeking him. Pray that if there isn't, that I would get a little relief for the almost rage I feel.
There is a lot that is bothering me in a way too...
Sometimes I feel very used and taken for granted by people. A lot of people are pretty shitty "friends" to me and I'm angry about that. It wears on me after a while. I'm tired of crying. But I don't want my heart to harden.
I swear I think a lot of it is hormonal/ chemical. It's like I don't know what came first, the feelings or the actual shitty situations. Maybe the hormonal time is a time for me to get it all out.... I don't know. I can't see straight. That' s where your prayers come in. I don't want to whine. Just writing you all right now is a bit of comfort and is helping me get a grip. Thanks...
I'm going to bed and hoping tomorrow will be better. We all have shitty days I suppose

I'm here!

2008-11-14T17:03:00.001-08:00

Just a quick post to say hello to you all. I may have come a little late to the party, but I'm here now. I've brought beer - help yourselves.

I'd just like to share my latest insight, that God was in fact the first ever dentist. See Psalm 81:10 for proof :o)

Contest

2008-11-14T03:30:00.001-08:00

I was on the Stuff Christians Like blog. And he happened to mention "Christian wear" -- namely boxer shorts.

I want to have a contest for the very best Christian boxer short slogan. Multiple submissions allowed.

I shudder to think what you all might come up with. But figured it was a good ice breaker rofl

Great Transformation?

2008-11-12T21:48:00.000-08:00

Hey guys, I said I was going to post in more detail about what happened on my trip to Texas with my friend, but, I posted it on my blog instead. If you want to go over and read it over there feel free to do so! mygodjourney.blogspot.com The title is called "Great Transformation?" I just thought it was really long and not everyone would be interested in reading it!!! Comments are welcome! It's a process and Father is helping me through losing this friend, it will just take time! Thanks again for your prayers and thoughts!

In Freedom, Nicole!

What song makes you feel alive?

2008-11-11T17:58:00.000-08:00

Here is mine, Dancing Queen by Abba

Dancing Queen

Hi, from Ché

2008-11-11T10:18:00.000-08:00

Many of you may not know me. I don't comment alot, and I don't post uber-frequently on my blog.
But I'm here, listening and learning from you all, and praying when prayer is asked for...or even when it's not.
I'm a really private person.
When I mentioned to my best friend, Kelly, that I'd discovered that I'm a loner....she fell on the floor laughing, saying, "You've only RECENTLY discovered this?"
I guess she wasn't overly surprised.
I don't have alot of close friends, but when I do get close to people, I get really close and love them for life.
Anyways, all this to say, I'm stepping out a little here to ask for some prayer support.
I'm in some financial crisis...though saying that makes me feel stupid. I'm almost ALWAYS in financial crisis since my husband left.
I'm a single parent, and I work lots. Yet, it's a barely over minimum wage job, which I keep because I like it, and I get benefits and some bonuses.
I work at Starbucks.
I've been asking God to help me....not to rescue me. What I mean is this: I want to learn how to work with the finances I have rather than keep praying for financial windfalls. Does that make sense?
I have this dream.
I want to own my own house.
I absolutely love to decorate, and renovate. I do alot in this rental I'm in because it needs it, and because it's a beautiful heritage home that I love.
My dream is so big and so unreachable.
I have trouble paying for my bills, and buying groceries at the same time.
I have debt, lots of it the result of closing down my bookstore. Some of it because I have times where I've just run away for a mini vacation and didn't have money so I put it on credit. I feel insanely guilty about that, cause it's not really being responsible.
Yet, somehow it's been needed.
So...if you all are willing, would you pray for me?
I want to be responsible with my finances. I also want to take care of this person called ME.
I want to be a great mom.....and I want to fall in love with my Creator.
I want to have hope.....and I want to be a good friend.
I want to follow my dreams..and I want to take care of my family.
All these disparate wants swirl around inside me....and make me a little crazy.

So, could you?

For Andy, Zaavan, and Tilly (forgive me if I have forgotten anyone)

2008-11-11T04:01:00.000-08:00

A man sent me a book when we got the diagnosis on Andy, inside was a CD with this song on it. It really sums it up, I haven't heard it in about 6 years.

psst.

2008-11-11T00:08:00.000-08:00

several of you said you wanted to know when there was more. there's a little more. for your perusal.
and now: infinite possibilities part 1.
the newest:infinite possibilities part 2.

Prayer Healing

2008-11-09T17:17:00.000-08:00

Hi all
Was wodnering if you could pray for us. Particularly my 4 year old (Tilly) she has epelespy and at the mo we cant seem to get it under control and if she has 1 fit she will have at least 5 but can have as many as 13.
Also her behaviour is off the planet and I dont know what to do about it. On the weekend she threw her sister nintendo DS out of the sencond story window of out house. Luckily it landed in the rose bush. Any way my hubby delt with her and after much screeming and carrying on she came and said sorry. But not more than 1/2 later she went into our room and threw anything she could find out our window. She painted the bathroom wall with my foundation and the hot water ciylinder with green acrlic paint. Each time she gets a smack and time out and each time there is crying and screeming that goes on for 10-15 mins. And that was just Sunday! In the end I was so angry with her I told her that I wished she lived some where esle which is an awful dreadful thing to say and I feel like a witch for saying it, even if at the time it was partially true
I feel guilty becasue I think that it might be because I work so much. But she has been stubborn since the day she was born
Can you pray for both healing for her and wisdom for Matt and I as we try and figure out how to best teach her and guide her please

Sunday Briefs

2008-11-09T11:13:00.000-08:00

Hey!
Anyone care to chime in, drop a few lines and let us all know how you're doing, especially if you haven't in a while...
The family cares

The Bios Cabinet

2008-11-07T08:06:00.000-08:00

For those who added short Bio's under the original post, I have taken those and created brand new posts with them and they are all labeled as "Bio's". You can get to these by clicking on the Bio's Cabinet Door in the sidebar.

If you are interested in adding your Bio to the list, all you have to do is create a new post and put "Bio's" in the label box at the bottom of the post box.

If you want to edit your current bio, there are a couple of things that you can do.

The First Way

Click Customize on the Blogger Task Bar
Click Posting on the Tabs
Click Edit Posts on the sub-tabs
In the labels box in the left side bar, click Bio's
Find your Bio and click Edit
Edit your bio and click Publish Post when done

The Second Way

From Rahab's, Click on the Bio's link in the Kitchen Cabinets widget in the sidebar
Scroll down until you find your Bio
At the bottom of your post, you will find "Posted by XXX at (time)". Quick Editing has been enabled on this blog so you should see a yellow pencil to the right. Click on it.
Edit your post
Click Publish Post when done

There is also another intersting thing that you can do from the editor. In the lower left hand corner of the box, there is a blue link labeled Post Options. Clicking on this link will expand the box and give you the options to either allow or not allow reader comments on your post and also to change the post time and date.

Changing the post date and time is a nice ability to have for updates to posts. You can change the post date and time to reflect the current date and time and your post will automatically go to the front page, on top. Then, everyone will know that it has been updated.

jON also mentioned having links to our blogs here as well so for a start, on the bio's that I have done, the blog links are at the bottom of the bio's.

Please let me know if you have any input one way or the other.

Peace

question for your contemplation

2008-11-06T07:01:00.000-08:00

are you the same person in real life as you are here in the blog world?

and what i mean is this... do you speak to people in everyday life the way you do here? do you have the same sorts of conversations? do they bleed over into your regular life? do you carry the same convictions and ideals with you everywhere you go? or do you find yourself living a dichotomy of being one person here, and being another in you real life?